So how do you know....

...when you've met the one. I have seen those sappy movies where the woman goes out meets someone comes back and says "I met the man I am going to marry." and of course in the sappy movies they always do. And I having met Paul (again) have been giving it some thought about him and past relationships. I do recall saying about another boy that he "could" be the one or "I think he's the one." to someone. But how do you really know?

Do you pick the man who takes you good and bad? I mean don't most people who are your friends take you good or bad. Why don't we marry our friends. How do you know he's the one. Because he calls when he says he will, because he's the person you think about most, because he shares the same goals you do...seriously when do you know.

Many of my married friends say "You just know." but do you, do you really? And if the marriage ends in, God forbid, divorce do you then start expressing doubts you had.

What do I know you ask? I know I miss him when he's not around; I know when I get an e-mail with his name attached or the phone rings and it's him I smile even before I open the e-mail or answer the phone. He could read to me from the phone book and I would still think it was a great conversation (and yes once when we were 16 he did just that - can't even remember the context but it makes me smile). I know that I haven't even met his kids and I already think they are two of the most special people I will ever meet. I have talked to both and they are smart and funny and really great kids. And I know that when he walked off the plane my heart skipped a beat - I saw him and it was as if no time had passed and he was the same boy I fell in love with at 16.

But this could be true for a lot of other men too (except for the in love with at 16 bit). Could I potentially meet someone else who could eventually make me feel the same way. The romantic part of my says no, he's your other half, the piece of you that's missing but the intellectual part says - really Paula don't be ridiculous you are a whole person whether you are with someone or not, and at 37 the intellectual part of me knows that's the truth. As a human being we crave company (which is why solitary confinement is a truly horrific punishment) but we get that from friends, co-workers, random everyday people so why is the romantic kind required - it's not, people go through their lives never having knowing what it means to love someone or be loved in return. Divorced people may never marry or date again.

So how do you know. All I know is that he is the one and I can't imagine being apart from him again.

Lastly I recall once when I was 16 and we were lying on his bed I thought to myself "this is the man that I am going to marry" So I guess you do just know even if you have to wait 22 years later.